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- "He is as unaffected as Albert Einstein."
- "Now I'm an old Christmas tree, the roots of which have died. They just come along and while the little needles fall off me replace them with medallions."
- "I don't say we all ought to misbehave, but we ought to look as if we could."
- "Now we sit through Shakespeare in order to recognize the quotations."
- "Ask not what you can do for your country. Ask what's for lunch."



